Thankful, But Emotional

I recently grew quite close with one of my teachers. I wasn't even expecting it to happen the way it did. I was just talking to her about my grade when she asked me about something I wrote. She knew that at least when I had written it, I was really hurting. It's really hard for me to talk about my feeling and what's on my mind, but I just let go a little and told her. Before I could finish what I was saying some people walked into the room, and the conversation never got finished. I went home, and felt that things were left unclear. I went on the computer and wrote her a long email. I think that my emotions sort of overwhelmed and took over me. What I thought was going to be a short, to-the-point email ended up being a really emotional, heart-felted one. After I sent it, I kept hoping I would receive and email response right away, but I never did. When I got to her class she asked if she and I could talk after school. My anxiety started to kick in, and my heart started to race. I was really nervous, so I started to read some of things that people wrote in my yearbook. I came across my friend, Gillian's, and almost started crying. Her's was so down to earth, and personal. It really brought tears to my eyes. That distracted me for the time until school was completely over. After school, I went to her with butterflies in my stomach hoping she wasn't going to think I was crazy, or think that I had some SERIOUS problems or something. Luckily, I was wrong. She talked to me, and was able to connect with me for once. She and I talked for a while, but eventually I had to go meet some friends before they got worried. I was a little shaken up afterwards, because mainly I was really fighting back tears the whole time she and I were talking. {Gillian, if you are reading this right now I know what you are thinking and I'm sorry. I'm trying hard. :/} Also, some of the stuff we talked about were just really hard to bring back to the surface. Now that I'm thinking about it, I'm really thankful that she pulled me aside in the first place. I'm really thankful to be able to have talked about some of that stuff with an adult, and for her to be able to understand, connect, and give me advice on the matter. As nervous as I was today, I'm really glad that it happened.
Anyway, today was sort of tough knowing that the seniors are graduating tomorrow. I'm so sad that they're leaving. I grew so great relationships with them, and some of those relationships were so strong that thinking that the seniors are not going to be here with me next years makes me want to cry. Some of them were my best friends. Two in particular I will miss a lot. David who can always make me smile, and I can talk about some of those most awkward but hilarious things ever with. And Gillian who was always there to pick me up when I was down, and who became one of my bestest friends. I'll miss them all so much. Tomorrow will be an emotional day for me as I see them graduate without me, but I honestly couldnt be prouder of them. I'll miss you guys! :')
lovelovelove,
Melissa